When I Fall in Love.....

I woke up one morning to find myself in love with the most amazing and wonderful person I have ever met.  Although we have not known each other long enough to justify our feelings to others, we are justified to ourselves.

Shortly after 2014 began, it hit me like an anvil from an old Popeye cartoon.  We had a phone call, probably our 40th in 40 days, and things went a bit south.  We hung up and I panicked.

When I woke up the next morning I felt as if my soul had been ripped from my body.  I felt as if my heart was on life support.  It was at that moment that I realized I had fallen in love with her.

I cried so very hard that day worried that she wouldn't be around anymore.  It was then that I realized that I couldn't imagine my life without her in it.  An emotion wrought with both excitement and fear.  To feel so attached to someone, quickly or slowly, does not matter, but to be attached was to realize that I really had fallen in love with her.

We met at work while I mindlessly polished silverware and she told another about her cat.  I looked up and saw the most beautiful woman ever.  And for the next several weeks we connected and I felt like she and everyone else could see right through me.  I couldn't hide my growing feelings for her.  And everyday we were together at work, was another day I felt excitement growing. 

I left that job but didn't leave her. And she didn't leave me.  We talked endlessly on the phone night after night, growing closer and closer, connecting deeper and deeper. There was an intensity and an immediacy in our hearts.

It didn't take me long at all to fall for her.  No one has ever made me laugh and smile as much as she.  No one has ever made me as calm, comforted and accepted as she. And I guess in return I made her feel exactly the same.

I feel like I've been searching for her my entire life. I am scared when I think how close I came to never meeting her.  I sit in bed and think to myself how lucky I am that she has chosen me too.

She loves me, and I so love her.  I never want to be apart from her.  I never want to know what it would be like if she weren't around. 

I love her.